Record Breakers

all sorts of malarkey to stuff your brain with
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China's 245mph train service is the world's fastest...
27th December 2009
China's new system connects the modern cities of Guangzhou and Wuhan at an average speed of 217mph - and it took just four years to build. The super-high-speed train reduces the 664-mile journey to just a three-hour ride and cuts the previous journey time by more than seven-and-a-half hours, the official Xinhua news agency said.

Work on the project began in 2005 as part of plans to expand a high-speed network aimed at eventually linking Guangzhou, a business hub in southern China near Hong Kong, with the capital Beijing, Xinhua added. 'The train can go 245mph, it's the fastest train in operation in the world,' said Zhang Shuguang, head of the transport bureau at the railways ministry.

Test runs for the service began earlier in December and the link officially went into service when the first scheduled train left the eastern metropolis of Wuhan on Saturday. By comparison, the average for high-speed trains in Japan was 150mph while in France it was 172mph, said Xu Fangliang, general engineer in charge of designing the link.

Beijing has an ambitious rail development programme aimed at increasing the national network from the current 53,437 miles to 74,564 miles, making it the most extensive rail system outside the United States. China unveiled its first high-speed line at the time of the Beijing Olympics in 2008 - a service linking the capital with the port city of Tianjin. In September, officials said they planned to build 42 high-speed lines by 2012 in a massive system overhaul as part of efforts to spur economic growth amid the global downturn.

Tickets for the service went on sale at new stations in the three cities last weekend, with prices ranging from 780 yuan (£71) for first class to 490 yuan (£45) for second class

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Burj Dubai to be world's tallest building
The 2,683 feet tall Burj Dubai will be declared the world's tallest building when it is opened on Monday.
By Richard Spencer in Dubai
1 Jan 2010
Life in present-day Dubai is not for the faint-hearted. But for those who fear neither heights nor financial crisis, the Gulf city-state is to offer an entirely new experience: the chance to spend the rest of your days thousands of feet up in the air. Monday sees the long-awaited opening of the Burj Dubai, not only the world's tallest building but the world's tallest building by some 1,000 feet. At 2,683 feet tall, it is the height of the current highest skyscraper, Taipei 101 in Taiwan, with the Eiffel Tower perched on top.

It has been designed so that those who wish to do so will never have to leave, or even descend below the 108th floor, at about 1,300 feet. That is the height up to which there will be residential apartments. For work, you can nip to the offices upstairs - anywhere up to the 160th floor, in fact. To eat, you can visit the restaurant on the 122nd, and to exercise you can use the gym on the 123rd, about 1,440 feet off the ground. The gym has both an indoor and, unnervingly, an outdoor swimming pool. One might fear such a high-flying yet enclosed life would get a little dull. But the tower's developers have a solution there, at least for the young. The Burj Dubai is also intending to host the world's highest nightclub, 20 floors higher still than the gym.

Since ground was broken on the project in January 2004, the tower has inspired huge debate in Dubai which has mirrored the fortunes of the emirate after which it is named. For the company which built it, Emaar, and the ruler of Dubai, Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid al-Maktoum, it is a "shining accomplishment ... an icon of the new Middle East: prosperous, dynamic and successful".

The purple prose of tourist guidebooks has already had difficulty keeping up with Dubai's transformation from an oriental souk, with picturesque dish-dasha-clad locals bobbing on the creek in wooden dhows to the world capital of bling. For them, the Burj Dubai has proved a challenge. "Just damn tall," was the pithy conclusion of The Lonely Planet. It can hardly be blamed. Burj in Arabic means tower, so that the building, which is set next to the Dubai Mall and the world's tallest fountain, called the Dubai Fountain, is actually named less than imaginatively "Dubai Tower".

As the global debt-fuelled property boom came to an end, Dubai's vision has turned to nightmare and with Dubai's fall from grace in November after admitting a multi-billion-dollar hole in its finances, the Burj took on a deeper symbolism. Its sharp spire appeared to "pierce the bubble in the sky". One commentator compared it to Ozymandias, the poem in which Shelley describes the arrogant wreckage of a long-disappeared empire. "Outrageous, wasteful, egotistical, ridiculous," a journalist wrote of the Burj after Dubai asked for a standstill on its debt repayments. He portrayed its "sneer of cold command" as "thrusting a finger at the outside world even as its Ozymandian surroundings sink beneath the economic waters of the Gulf".

Whether Dubai's economy fails or recovers, however, the brute facts will remain: 8 million cubic feet of concrete, 31,000 tons of reinforcing steel, 167,000 square feet of stainless steel cladding, and 1.1 million square feet of double glazing have been mixed together to create a spire visible from 60 miles away across the desert. It will dwarf the new 1,776 ft 1 World Trade Center, also known as "Freedom Tower", being built on Ground Zero in New York, and is unlikely to be surpassed any time soon. The world recession has not been kind to mega-projects. Emaar's great rival in Dubai, Nakheel, builder of the Palm Islands, proposed a one-kilometre tall tower in 2008, but has put it on ice while it tries to tackle its multi-billion dollar debts.

As to the Burj's actual height, that remains officially a secret, which is odd since the developers have already told newspapers it is 818 metres tall, or 2,683 feet. Also a mystery is who is going to live and work there, which is said to be a matter of client confidentiality. Despite the recession, the developers say it is sold out.
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The 1mm tiger sculpture that's smaller than a grain of rice
A Taiwanese artist has created what he claims is the smallest sculpture of a tiger ever made - so small it could fit through the eye of a needle, and can only be seen properly with a magnifying glass.
Chen Forng-shean, who has been sculpting as a hobby for around 30 years, carved the tiger from resin in anticipation of the Chinese lunar Year of the Tiger, which begins on February 14. Standing at just 1 millimetre (0.04 inch) high, and just over a millimetre long, he says that it's the world's tiniest tiger.

But Chen admits that the brightly coloured beast nearly got the best of him over 10 attempts to create it: 'If the hands shake a little bit, the work would jump away and disappear. For this tiger, the toughest part is because it is three-dimensional. It can be looked at from any angle and still seem very lively. Colouring is also very hard, with the patterns on his back and the red colour on his tongue,' Chen, 54, added.

The single animal, created after three months of intensive labour, was finished in November and Chen - a minting plate designer by trade - said it was worth 3 million Taiwanese dollars (around £58,000), although it is not for sale.

Tigers, which rotate with 11 other animals on the Chinese lunar year zodiac, are said to bring variable luck, being dependable and unpredictable at the same time. Chen said he has already felt the suspense the new year is likely to bring. 'My job is dealing with very fine things, so I learned to breathe and hold my breath,' he said. 'Now when I take a breath, I can hold it for 60 seconds, and then I can engrave every stroke with the rhythm of my pulse.'

Chen has used rice, sand, thread, dental floss and ant heads and fly wings to do other miniature sculptures, which are a hallmark of high-end ancient Chinese art. He expects to carve for five more years, producing even smaller sculptures and including scenes that encase mountains, waterfalls, and people.

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The very idea of trying to do that has me shaking with frustration!

ahhhhhfuggggggggggit!!!!!!!!!!!! (throw, smash, stomp!)
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Blind grandmother lands monster 110kg catfish... and enters the record books
By Lizzie Smith
19th January 2010
A grandmother has entered the record books after catching the biggest ever freshwater fish by a British woman - a 15st 4lb catfish. Sheila Penfold, who stands at just 5ft 3in and is registered blind, was nearly dragged into the river when the monster catfish took her bait during a holiday in Spain. The 56-year-old had to be directed by husband Alan and son Arthur as she fought for 30 minutes to land the prized 214lb catch. It was the biggest fish ever caught by a woman in Spain.

Mrs Penfold, who is partially sighted, only realised how big her catch was when she saw it up close. She said: 'I was exhausted but elated afterwards. The record has taken a while to sink in. I'm still walking around with a smile on my face. But it goes to show that just because you are blind it doesn't stop you breaking records like this.'

Mrs Penfold, from Wandsworth in London, used a bait of halibut pellets to snare the 8ft 2ins long catfish on the River Ebro near Barcelona. She said: 'I had three rods lined up on the bank and when one of them tipped over Arthur told me which one it was. I grabbed hold of it and was immediately pulled towards the water. Luckily I managed to stop myself and I started to reel it in. But for some reason I turned round and said that I didn't think it was going to be a big one. Then all of a sudden it took off again and it took the line of the reel. When it broke the surface of the water Alan told me it was a big size. I saw it for the first time when it was near the edge and it looked a monster.'

The specimen was so huge it took Alan, a 62-year-old retired gardener, Arthur and two colleagues to heave it into a weighing slip.
What whopper: Sheila with tour guide Dan Smith, who helped her return the fish to the river

After having her picture taken with it, Mrs Penfold returned the catfish back into the water in good health. She said: 'Alan wasn't at all jealous and was really pleased for me.' Mr Penfold said: 'She isn't really a big woman but she stuck to it and got it in the end, although it took everything out of her. She did brilliantly, especially as she is registered blind.'

The record for the biggest fish caught in Britain by a woman is a 69lb 8oz catfish caught by Bev Street, 46, from Skegness. Mike Heylin, of the British Records Fish Committee, said: 'I would think this is the biggest freshwater fish caught by a British woman. The only freshwater fish that grow to that size in the world are either sturgeon or catfish. As far as I'm aware there has been no sturgeon of that size caught by a woman before and the Ebro is home to probably the biggest catfish in the world.
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World's biggest bottle of wine created, world's biggest hangover to follow
Anybody want to share a bottle of red? A group of Chinese winemakers have claimed the new world record for the world's biggest ever bottle of wine.
The 15ft high bottle contains an astonishing 1,850 litres of wine, produced by Wang Chen Wines in Liaoning, northern China. That's over three times the amount held by the previous record-holders, Austrian winemakers Kracher, whose bottle held 490 litres of Grande Cuvee TBA NV No.7 2005.

'We are very proud, and the wine is very good. We have all had a glass from the bottle to celebrate,' said a company spokesman.

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:pissedup: :balloons: :pointr: :bored:
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Diamond the size of a 'chicken's egg' sells for record $35.3 million
A 507½-carat gem discovered in South Africa last year has become most expensive rough diamond ever sold.
26 Feb 2010
Hong Kong’s Chow Tai Fook Jewellery Company bought the Cullinan Heritage stone for $35.3m, Petra Diamonds announced on Friday. Petra recovered the gem, the 19th largest ever found – described as the size of a chicken's egg, from its Cullinan mine near Pretoria in South Africa in September last year .

Petra said that record price reflected the "incredible rarity" of stone based on its "remarkable size" and "exceptional colour and clarity". “It is fitting that the Cullinan Heritage should achieve a sale price of $35.3 million, the highest sale price on record ever achieved for a rough diamond, as it has the potential to produce one of the world’s most important polished gems. The sale proceeds further bolster Petra’s treasury and will be invested in the growth of our core assets.” said Johan Dippenaar, Petra's chief executive. Chow Tai Fook has yet to outline its plans for the stone.

The world’s biggest diamond, the 3,106-carat Cullinan, was discovered in the same mine in 1905. That was cut to form the Great Star of Africa and Lesser Star of Africa, set in Britain’s crown jewels.

Petra got $9.48 million at a sale in May for a polished 7.03-carat blue gem, also from the Cullinan mine, setting a per-carat record. A carat is a fifth of a gram.
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Now there's a record we can all aspire to breaking!
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Chocks away for world's biggest model aircraft
shame £8,000 B-50 bomber can only fly for 8min
22nd April 2010
With Britain's skies in lockdown over the last week, this was about the only plane that could fly. There's a good reason for that - it's just an electric model aircraft, albeit the world's biggest. The Boeing B-50 Superfortress is classified as a light aircraft and is licensed by the Civil Aviation Authority.

Built by Tony Nijhuis in his garage the aircraft is a scale version of the US 1950s bomber, has a 20ft wingspan and weighs just over seven stones (50kg). It took Mr Nijhuis, from Hastings, East Sussex, two years to make the radio-controlled plane that he calls the 'jolly green giant' and cost him £8,000.

The 46-year-old model-maker has spent 30 years making model aeroplanes and decided to create an electric version of the 1950s bomber from scratch. It has 96 batteries that power four electric motors which drive the aircraft to 40mph along a 50m runway before it takes off. It can then fly for eight minutes in the air before it has to descend so the batteries can be recharged. Made from balsa wood and plywood, the plane also has workable bomb bay doors and pneumatic landing gear.

It is restricted to 400ft, but after the volcanic ash cloud grounded aircraft, Tony has been making the most of the empty skies. The plane is 7:1 scale model and has entered the record books after being launched.

The father-of three, who works as a consultant engineer, said: 'This is the heaviest electric model aircraft in the world. The bigger the planes are the easier they are to fly. This has elevator control, rudder control, pneumatically operated under carriage and the bomb bay doors open and could drop real bombs, if you wanted'

'It's a model of the Boeing B-50 bomber that was used from the 1950s to the 1970s. It's all scratch built and has a wingspan of 19ft. It weighs just over 100lb and is powered by four, four kilowatt electric motors and each motor has 24 batteries powering it. The propellers have a 2ft diameter. I've been working on it on and off for the last two years and made it in a single garage. It comes in eight pieces and has to be bolted together.

'The bigger the planes are the easier they are to fly. This has elevator control, rudder control, pneumatically operated under carriage and the bomb bay doors open and could drop real bombs if you wanted. However, unlike smaller models, if this crashed it would disintegrate.

'Because of its size it is classed as a light aircraft and had to be tested by the Civil Aviation Authority and requires a certificate to fly it at public shows. We can only fly it for eight minutes because the batteries need charging and there is an alarm to let us know when the time is running out. But full size electric planes are being developed; the power is there, it's just that it needs to be sustained for longer.'
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Serial Killer Claims Sniping Record
A potential CRACK-HEAD shot two Afghanis recently, but that's only part of the story on his DEATH PATROL.

Sniper Craig Harrison, 35, marked his bedpost with two more notches after killing the two locals with a rifle bullet each, as the pair apparently manned a machine gun - then for good measure let rip a third shot that took out their weapon.

His marksmanship was all the more interesting because he murdered them from 3,000ft BEYOND his rifle's effective range. Household Cavalryman Craig, of Cheltenham, Gloucs - who went on to be the toast of pro-military scum by killing a dozen more and wounding seven without ever once being called a Serial Killer - said of his record-breaking feat yesterday: "They were firing on the troop commander - I gave them the good news. They didn't fucking like it."

The previous record for a serial-sniper kill was 7,972ft (2,430m) set by a Canadian in Afghanistan eight years ago. Craig, armed with the Army's latest L115A3 sniper rifle, beat it by 148ft (45m) - and that's not glorifying in anyone's death, in case you're wondering. In fact, Jesus Loves Killing.

The weapon is designed to be effective up to 1,500 metres. To compensate for the spin and drift of the .338 bullets as they flew 1.54 miles - the length of 25 football pitches - Craig had to aim 6ft high and 20ins to the left. Despite the bullets travelling at almost three times the speed of sound, the married dad of one was so far away it took them 2.64 seconds to reach their targets. Of course, being a cowardly fucking sniper it's not as if he was ever at risk of worrying about being treated as the lowest of the low in military terms on the actual battlefield.

He said: "The first round hit the machinegunner in the stomach. The second insurgent grabbed the weapon as my second shot hit him in the side. He went down too. They were both dead. It was great, and I had a wank just after it."
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Is this from the Daily Mail?
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The Sun - but I slightly edited it a bit...

If they're going to glorify murderers, it seems only fair to take the piss.
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A Moroccan flag measuring 60,000 square metres and weighing 20 tonnes is seen in the town of Dakhla. The flag is an attempt to beat the record for the world's largest flag.

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The world's hardest baby-buggy...
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BWAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!
This huge hen egg is thought to be Britain's biggest ever and likely to take some beating. The 135g (5oz) beauty, laid by Oscar in Southport, Merseyside, is thought to be Britain’s biggest ever.

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I reckon Oscar was more surprised than anyone!
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this is the world record attempt for the highest jump on roller-blades - off the first platfrom of the Eiffel Tower... but while it all sounds great I wasn't that impressed, you'll see why.
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930 entrants attempt to break the Guinness World Record for irony.
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